Lynne d Johnson



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06.25.02 12:13 AM


I am torn about my feelings for the ex. Not in the same way as before, but now mainly in the manner of whether I should allow ex's new life with the new lover to affect me at all. I get emotional sometimes, b/c they are doing things in which I often feel like, "It should've been me." But again, as I stated once long ago in this diary, I was no angel in this. I somehow severed the link that forced ex's hand. But damn... I still feel, deeply. Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed. And my life has taken new directions in its own right, just wondering sometimes had we still been together, where would we be now. Would we be on the same path that ex is on with new lover? Or would we be somewhere else? Sometimes though, you just gotta' let ish go. I need to remind myself of that every now and again.

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